Martial rape

Rape in our society is always a difficult topic to talk about. It’s talking about a breach of a human being’s body, trust, hope, sanity, emotions and confidence by other human. It seems unthinkable when you put it that way, no? Unfortunately, martial rape or non consensual exists in many societies in the world.

In our society many people don’t think of marital or non consent sex as a rape. It’s not something happening in dark room. There is no gun to the head situation between the partners. It involves not stranger threat. It’s the husband, a woman’s own life partner. Some rejections martial rape as a nasty part of a woman’s marital duties; others categorize martial rape as attention, love and warmth from the husband towards his wife, oh thankfully not his mistress.

Stop! Women are not a robot which acts how you programmed it . martial rape is still a violation. Women do not belong to their husbands only. Rape within marriage isn’t any form of love. Yeah it’s a form of domestic violence and sexual abuse to the dignity of women being.

martial rape or non consensual sex is defined by many people on their own way, to me it is any unwanted sexual activities by a spouse or ex-spouse, committed against the person’s will or willingness, and it is obtained or get by force, beating or threat, intimidation or when the person is unable to consent or express his or her views .

Historically, a man could not and to this day, cannot be criminally prosecuted or punished for raping his wife under Pakistani legislation. it can be easily observed that the problem lies in our society being govern by misogamist who consider women as only tools or object of pleasure. Being married doesn’t change the social rules. Just because a woman said “I do” to marriage doesn’t mean that she has said “I do” to sexual intercourse whenever, wherever, and however her husband wants it.

Due to the outmoded rule that martial rape is not frequently considered as an offence, it is supposed by the law that, marriage cited to the wife giving consent or will to all the “matrimonial duty and chore” including sexual desires. Even though Pakistan as a nation is based on the theory of equity, it still has not acknowledged the right a woman has in controlling marital intercourse as a part or elements of equality. As the nation we lacks any sort of legal amenity and laws related martial rape, the victims’ only haunt is to go to court.

Courts have many different methods to identify martial rape and have given strict punishments but due to the lack of legal provisions, they are skipped and hence cannot describe “forceful intercourse by a man upon his wife” as martial rape or non consensual sex. Hence, the Judiciary is not enough and it requires the help of the legislature. The laws have to adapt and see to the changing reality of our society.

“Allowing a martial rape and not reporting in court and not criminalizing it, and it actually means that human dignity and respect can be granted and lesser value and importance in case of a woman when she gets married. It obviously wrong and troublesome to insure the dignity, respect and sexual liberty to the husband, considering him a dominant person, not the wife “

The causes behind a wrongdoing of this kind can be followed back to the social position given to the women in Pakistani society. Generally in Pakistan women have been considered to be possessed but their parents and afterward their spouses. Subsequently, assault can be to a certain degree, and can be compared to the wrongdoing against property. This is often why in old time the punishment against moreover included paying recompense to the victim father or husband.

Since the wife is considered as asset l of the husband and a man cannot commit a crime against his own property, the question of Martial rape doesn’t arise at all. Hence, the fact those males have to establish ownership over a woman after marriage makes a married woman more susceptible to being exploited by her husband. It is indeed apparent in Muslim personal law that a woman is treated inferior to a man. Her presence seems from her connection to a man; her father or her husband. Thus, she never says that a man who has “ownership” over her has violated her or committed a crime against her.

Allowing Martial rape and not criminalizing it, merely means that human dignity can be considered lesser value and importance in the case of a woman when she gets married. It is naturally wrong and troublesome to assure dignity and sexual freedom to the husband and not the wife. The argument that the act cannot be criminalized to protect the stability of the institution of marriage is biased and illogical. Only when two partners are given equal rights over their bodies can the “sacred” institution of marriage bloom.

Many countries do not collect data on Martial rape in the world – not just because it is not a crime, but because social pressures mean it is rarely reported or discussed openly or even on social media. Women are often split between wanting the violence to end by reporting it and not wanting the husband and main breadwinner to be jailed and punished. Their decision depends on how socially acceptable it is to get a divorce and on their own financial independence. But we need to realize that, the rape is rape – whether it occurs to a woman of a particular age, in marriage or a relationship.

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Rape or any non consensual sexual intercourse between non spouses has always been illegal in everywhere in the world, but in Pakistan where Martial rape or non consensual intercourse between spouses is not taken seriously or always legal. Here there any many types of Martial rape are been seen which are as:

The very fast kind of non consensual sex is if a husband forces sex through verbal threats of harm to his wife, she cares about or if he comes to her in a scarcely contained rage, she can’t consent. She can only obey rather than risk being harmed physically, mentally or emotionally. And it is mostly seen in rural areas of Pakistan where there people are influenced by male domination.

Secondly if a husband calls his wife names, accuses her of not being a good wife, or blackmails her emotionally by suggesting she’s so bad in bed that he will go elsewhere, and will fulfill his needs, in this way he’s manipulating her. Some men even threaten to leave her and take the kids with him if their wives don’t comply with demands for sex. When a wife falls for these tactics, it isn’t consent or not her willingness. It’s just a rape. It is more common in South Punjab

Thirdly yes loving sex or willingness for sex between husband wives is genuinely consensual. If a woman is drugged, asleep, intoxicated or unconscious, she obviously can’t give consent. Even if she says “yes” in such circumstances, the willingness is not true. She’s in no shape to consider the consequences or to participate as a willing partner, it happens rarely in Lahore.

Fourthly when Some men keep themselves in a position of superiority or dominancy by controlling all the money, by making contact with friends and family difficult to impossible, or by making sure there is no way for her to get transportation out of the house. The woman becomes a hostage in her own home. Like many hostages, she gives up and gives in to whatever he wants — including sex and it happens in rural areas mostly .it mostly happens in south and central Punjab, mostly they go to get married in northern areas of Pakistan and keeping them in their hostages.

 
Last not the least type of non consensual sex is when giving in sex isn’t the same as giving consent. When a woman feels that it’s just easier to give in to sex than to respect her own needs, she is being raped; she takes it a last option, not a choice. it happens when a woman is not financially strong or has no other sources to feed herself, then she becomes slave to her husband.

But question here arises when a man feels that his wife is not physically unfit for sex, he thinks to get married again, even for four times ,but in why in most cases when a woman finds her man as unfit for sex, she stays with him for whole life, taking or asking for divorce is very rare. These things are yet to discuss.

( This article is opinion based independent of the website )

Written By Nazrana khan

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